02
What this can feel like

From the inside, it often sounds like this.

  • You can’t remember the last stretch of weeks that didn’t feel a little flat.
  • You enjoy things in retrospect more than in the moment.
  • You’ve learned to suspect the word “fine” when you say it.
  • You have functional habits that hide how tired you feel underneath.
  • Small disappointments land disproportionately hard, then disappear under a kind of resignation.
  • You sometimes wonder if you’d notice if life got better.